Episode 1. The Mouth Tells
We all know that some people are the real deal – and others, well who they say they are, isn’t who they really are on the inside. And that – that’s dangerous. So question is – how do we tell the difference between the real ones and the phoneys. Turns out – there are some […]
We all know that some people are the real deal – and others, well who they say they are, isn’t who they really are on the inside. And that – that’s dangerous. So question is – how do we tell the difference between the real ones and the phoneys. Turns out – there are some very clear indicators.
Funny thing you know but what we say and how we say it, well it’s a dead give away for who we are. What’s going on in our hearts, either good or evil. In fact we just can’t help ourselves. What we say is truly a mirror to the soul. It’s because, I think, our mouths are connected to our hearts and whatever’s going on in our hearts, well ultimately that overflows to our mouth.
The problem is that sometimes, sometimes we meet people who aren’t for real. What you see definitely isn’t what you get. These are people who lie and deceive and manipulate. Now I always find that sad because I want to believe the best in people. I want to give every person the opportunity to excel and to shine and to use their gifts and their talents and their resources that Gods given them.
But as much as that’s who I am from time to time I’ve been bitten, if you like, by people who are hiding something. And so something I’ve had to learn to do and something I’m still learning to do is how to discern good from bad, the genuine person from the liar and the deceiver.
It’s sad that we have to learn that but learn it we must otherwise we’re going to be taken in and taken advantage of. So for me it’s a fine line between giving everyone the benefit of the doubt and the opportunity to excel on the one hand but being wise and discerning on the other.
How do we do that? Well fortunately God has some wisdom for us on this important subject and as it turns out its wisdom that works.
Over the years I’ve interviewed dozens of people for different roles and positions in the companies that I’ve worked for, the company that I owned and now the ministry, Christianityworks to which Gods called me to.
So it’s a familiar thing to me now. We figure out what help we need, we write down a position description and with that position description we always document the attributes of a person that we’re looking for. We’re all different and we’re not all suited to every position, that’s obvious, so the attributes of the person, their gifting and their disposition, they’re incredibly important. Then we advertise the position, we receive written responses, we sift through those and we come up with a short list.
Then you interview those people and the point of me sharing this with you is simply this. Over the years countless people in these interviews have tried to lie their way into positions that I’ve been interviewing for. One way to look at it is they’re just putting their best foot forward, that’s one way.
But the reality is that if we look at the role and then deceive ourselves and the prospective employer because we really want the job or we really need the money, even though we’re not cut out for it, just think about that, what a crazy thing to do. Imagine being in a job that you’re not cut out for day after day after day. And yet people do it all the time.
I’ve only ever been interviewed for a job once and I’ve only ever had 4 jobs in my life. But I never, ever want to be in a role that I’m not cut out for.
So how do we discern what’s going on in people? What are the tell tale signs and signals that we need to be looking out for? Have a listen to Gods wisdom and that’s what we’ve been doing together over these last few weeks on the program in this series called Wisdom That Works. Listening to Gods wisdom throughout the Book of Proverbs in the Old Testament.
Anyway have a listen with me to what God has to say through King Solomon on how to discern a liar from the person who’s real. Proverbs chapter 10 beginning at verse 18:
Lying lips conceal hatred and whoever utters slander is a fool. When words are many transgression is not lacking but the prudent are restrained in their speech. The tongue of the righteous is choice silver but the mind of the wicked is little worth. The lips of the righteous feed many but fools die for lack of sense.
So there it is, Gods wisdom about lying lips and the reason that we need to be so careful of the liar is that his or her lying lips conceal hatred. Hatred’s a dangerous thing and right there in that one sentence God tells us how we can pick the liar who’s concealing hatred. Have another listen, Proverbs chapter 10, verse 18:
Lying lips conceal hatred and whoever utters slander is a fool.
You see a liar may deceive the rest of us for a little while but in the end he or she can’t help themselves, they have to show their true colours. And the person in whose heart there is bubbling away, this most dangerous of all cancers, hatred, eventually is the person who utters slander.
Eventually they can’t help themselves and this liar is the one who goes around speaking ill of other people, the gossiper, the one who says, ‘I don’t mean to gossip but Mary, did you hear what Mary did? Well you have to wonder.’ And on it goes. Do you know people like that?
If you do then the chances are that they have lying lips that are trying to cover up hatred. And when they just can’t help themselves anymore, when it becomes such hard work this deception they have going on they let their guard down and the way they do it is by gossiping and slandering others.
And so if you know someone like that be wary, be very wary of trusting them, of confiding in them, for relying on them ’cause when the pressure’s on there’s every chance they’ll let you down. There’s every chance that they’ll be gossiping about you behind your back.
Lying lips conceal hatred and whoever utters slander is a fool.
Now the other tell tale sign comes in the very next verse. Verse 19:
When words are many transgression is not lacking but the prudent (On the other hand) restrain their speech.
I remember a work colleague of mine, James, who used to say, ‘I’m always suspicious of people who talk a lot. I always think they’re hiding something’. Now of course some people are just talkers and that’s fine but James had a point and his intuition, as it turned out, reflected God’s wisdom. Often people who babble on and on and on, telling us how good they are and how talented they are and how much they can do for us. Often they’re the ones to watch out for.
When words are many transgression is not lacking.
In other words, sometimes all those words are a cover up for the failures and the sin and the weaknesses and the inadequacies they don’t want us to see. It’s like a magician, like an illusionist. A big part of the trick is to distract your eyes to get you to look at something else while they perform the trick right under your nose.
The opposite to this sort of person is the prudent one. And the prudent one restrains their speech. They’re someone who doesn’t need to impress us. They know they’re good and capable, they understand their limitations and just have a quiet confidence in who they are. They don’t need to blah, blah, blah to distract us from the truth.
The tongue of the righteous is choice silver; the mind of the wicked is of little worth. The lips of the righteous feed many but fools die for a lack of sense.
You know, 9 times out of 10 when we stop and listen to what’s actually being said the truth is simple and it’s pure and it rings out clear as a bell. It’s unmistakeable. Honesty, decency, goodness, they have gravitas, they have a weightiness to them, you can’t miss them.
This is the wisdom we discover in the Bible. Lying lips conceal hatred. When words are many transgression isn’t lacking. The prudent restrain their speech. The tongue of the righteous, well it stands out, it’s like choicest silver whereas the mind of the wicked is of little worth. The lips of the righteous feed many but fools die for a lack of sense.
I’ve got to tell you, it is just amazing the wisdom, the wisdom that we discover in the Bible. This wisdom from God that actually work